Monday, September 21, 2009

Most Hated Movies

There aren't too many movies I actively dislike. I think that every film has merit of some sort, even if it's just to provide unintentional humor. For me to hate it, it has to be really bad...

Last Days (2005)
"A movie based on the last few days of Kurt Cobain? How could this possibly suck?"

One hour later...

"Oh god, it feels like I've been sitting here for days! There's not characters or plot, just random shit happening. And...wait a second. I've seen this part already! They're repeating scenes! I hate you Gus Van Sant, I hate you!"

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me (1992)
"What the fuck is going on? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON? Is this thing over yet? Seriously? My brain is trying to jump out of my skull! End already!"
I hated it so much threw the DVD in the burn barrel out back and set it on fire. Then I felt better despite having wasted five dollars. David Lynch is a genius but when genius goes bad, it goes really bad!

Monster a-Go Go (1965)
"What? Are you serious? That was your ending? I sat through a mind numbing hour and a half of the blandest bullshit ever put on film and thats all you can give me? Rage building...urge to kill...rising..."

Wedding Crashers (2005)
"I seriously want to punch the people responsible for this film in the balls. Every last one of them. Super hard too so they can never procreate. Ha ha ha, misogyny and queer jokes are funny, right? Please kill me..."

Sigh. I made a vow never to quit a movie once I've started it. It's made me stronger but caused oh so much pain...

3 comments:

John-Michael Morgan said...

Cloverfield (2005)

"Hmm, a monster that destroys New York? It's over played, but maybe just this time..."

(5 minutes into the movie)

"BLEEEEGH...QUIT SHAKING THE FUCKING CAMERA YOU FUCKS!"

An epileptic kid with M.S. must've been holding the fucking thing.

Justin said...

Creepshow 3... my God... Has to be the absolute worst movie I've ever seen.

Kurdt said...

I haven't seen Creepshow 3. I was going to, then I read reviews that said it was an abomination and took it off my Netflix list. Sometimes it's good to have the internet around...