Thursday, January 15, 2009

More Saviour Machines

Well, one good response is as good as any I suppose, thanks Phantom Spitter! I haven't had much faith in my writing skills lately so I stopped writing for awhile and this story just sort of ruminated. I thought it would make a great graphic novel, but thats probably because I was scared that I would mess it up if I tried to actually write any of it. I'm my own worst critic I'm afraid.

I've decided not to post all of the story since now I'm actually kind of excited about trying to get all or pieces of it published. It's too bad that most magazines are only publishing stuff by well established authors, and not that much anymore either. The short story market is kind of dead unfortunately. Well, I guess that's what blogs are for right? I might not be getting paid but at least people are reading my stuff. If anyone knows a good magazine that takes short stories, please send the address my way.

Okay, I'll skip ahead in the story a bit to introduce another character.
This part is called:
The Amazing Alice Steals Her First Heart

Alice was lying on the floor, quietly doodling pictures on pieces of scrap paper when a pounding at the door of her room made her jump and scratch a large ugly hole in a cute little puppy she had been drawing.
"YOU LITTLE BITCH! YOU GET OUT HERE RIGHT NOW!"
That was her step dad of course, but his yelling and pounding were so loud she had to put her fingers in her ears and even then she could still hear him. She closed her eyes and tried to shut him out. Surprisingly, she found that when she concentrated hard enough she could turn the volume down to almost nothing. Being twelve years old and never been told that this wasn't something people could normally do, she just smiled and went back to making funny pictures. Suddenly her ears popped hard and the ugly noise came back into sharp focus.
"I'M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU ONE MORE TIME! YOU OPEN THIS DOOR OR I'M KICKING THE FUCKING THING DOWN AND THEN YOU'LL BE SORRY YOU WERE EVER BORN!"
Could he do that?, she thought. As if in answer the door frame gave a hideous squeal and shot out splinters of wood. A sickening feeling grew in her stomach and Alice realized that her mother wasn't home and if the tub of lard did manage to kick down the door, she was in very big trouble. This sickening feeling gave way to panic and she lunged for the small window above her desk.
She got it unlatched and was halfway through when the surprisingly sturdy door finally gave way with a sickening crack and slammed open hard, the knob leaving a hole in the wall behind it. Panic gave way to hysteria now, Alice struggled harder to get through the small window but only succeeded in getting herself stuck fast.
She could hear him breathing behind her as clear as a church bell on a quiet summer afternoon, could even make out the slight wheeze from his smokers lungs. Then she could smell him, his rancid unwashed body reeking of whiskey and stale tobacco. There was another smell there too, one that she had never experienced before. It was sharp as a knife in her nostrils and it scared her more than anything else in her short life ever had.
Then his hands were on her legs and with one quick yank she was over the desk, lying on the floor in front of him. Surprisingly he didn't look mad at all, in fact there was a smile on his fat ugly face. Alice was confused but wary. He laughed and said "Alice, you've been a bad girl and I think you need to be punished but I'm not going to beat you. I've got a much better way. Much more fun for both of us Now just lay back and relax."
Then he grabbed her arms and lay on top of her, pinning her to the floor.
"Get off get off get off!" Alice screamed in a blind panic and tried to squirm out from underneath him.
He sat up and belted her across the face. "Okay, if you want to play rough, we'll play rough little girl." He said through a gritted smile. She could see the tobacco stains on his teeth.
Then he hit her again, bloodying her lip and tore at her clothes, ripping her yellow dress to shreds. He laughed again and in one swift move tore off her panties.
I can't believe this is happening, she thought, oh God please make this stop, please make this stop! She wiggled an arm free and hit out at him with her fist trying meekly to fight him off.
"Little bitch" He said and laughed, "what the fuck are you going to do? You're going to lay there and take your punishment like a good little girl is supposed to."
Then he lay on top her of her again and fumbled with something inside his sweatpants. Then all at once, time slowed almost to a stand still. Alice could see dust particles hanging perfectly still in a shaft of sunlight from the open window. She looked at the face of her stepfather and could count the beads of sweat on his forehead. Then she felt it. It wasn't in yet but it was touching a part of her that no one else should have been allowed to touch. The blind panic and hysteria that had overtaken her gave way to unbridled rage and she pushed him with all her strength.
Alice couldn't believe what she was seeing. Still in slow motion, her fat blubbery disgusting pig of a step dad was flying through the air, still in slow motion. She watched in shock as he hit the far wall and smashed an outline of his body into the cheap plaster, knocking a framed picture onto his head.
Now time really did seem to stop as they both sat looking at each other, expressions of shock writ large on both of their faces. Then his face turned beet red and he ran at her screaming,
"YOU FUCKING BIIIIIIITCH!!!!"
Alice stood up quickly, closed her eyes, and swung her fist out to offer some sort of weak resistance. She felt it hit something hard which broke and snapped beneath her fist and then her hand was touching something warm and wet and pulsating. With her eyes still closed, she grabbed at it and pulled.
When she opened her eyes her stepfather was standing in front of her, mouth ajar, staring at the hole in his chest. He looked like he was about to say something but instead he collapsed into the pool of blood already soaking into the cheap shag carpet.
Alice stood and looked at the thing in her hands as it stopped beating. Her last thought right before her mind went was that it wasn't shaped like a heart at all, it wasn't even pink. And then the whole world rang with her screams.

3 comments:

Phantom Spitter said...

Kurdt, in all seriousness;

I have been around the net from blog to blog and this is the best piece of fiction from any blog I've ever seen.

You're right about the short story market. But please do a fanzine!

MORE!!!!

J.R. Spumkin said...

Oh, and to continue the music discussion: do you enjoy anything by System of a Down? In my opinion, in their time, they made some very fascinating music. Their first album is really, really good, the last song reflecting pure anger at the Armenian Genocide of the early 1900's.

Serj Tankian himself (the lead singer) released a decent solo album "Elect the Dead". Some stuff is really experimental, and a personal fave I'd recommend is "Saving Us".

kurdt said...

I never really got into SOAD but I do like the songs I've heard. Tankian's voice is crazy awesome and I think it's sad that they kind of got lumped in with all the nu-metal crap that was coming out at the same time they were.