Thursday, January 29, 2009

Choose Your Own Fate Experiment Part 2

With my vote for 2 it turned out to be a tie, and the dealer always wins ties so...

You decide that J.J and the rest of the Evans family can wait till you get some grub. It's probably a re-run anyways you tell yourself as you walk up the stairs to the kitchen. While the lightening flashes and the thunder booms and the rain drives hard at the windows you dig through the cupboards looking for food. Damn man, your family really needs to go to the store! The only thing you find is a box of Screaming Yellow Zonkers that looks about three months old.
You spit out the stale bits of popcorn you tried desperately to eat into the garbage and head for the fridge. Not much here either, some lunch meat and cheese, but you have no bread! Wait, whats that in the back?
You reach in and pull out a Tupperware container. Now what could this be? You open the lid and recoil as the nastiest smell you can imagine hits you full on in the face. It smells like moldy gym socks pulled out of Liberace's anus and left to bake in the sun. Still it is food...maybe if you put some cheese on it...
A sound from the container pulls you out of your reverie. Did that thing just make a mewling noise? You look closely at the purple and green blob. Is that an eye?
Where did this thing come from? You sort of remember doing a science experiment back in sixth grade to see how much mold would grow on a piece of meatloaf but that was three years ago! You ponder what to do with the smelly disgusting thing.

Do you...
1. Throw it in the trash.
2. Dump it down the garbage disposal and flip the switch.
3. Toss the nasty thing outside.
4. Get a fork and chow down!
5. Poke it with your finger.

2 comments:

Phantom Spitter said...

4! 4! It's the obvious choice! It's what I would do anyway.

J.R. Spumkin said...

4.

Mostly because of my insatiable habit of poking things I shouldn't. That's how Miss Susie Thomas gave me my first restraining order at the tender age of 6.

I hope she shoves her "sexual harassment" up her ass... ironic, is it not?